Here’s the thing about a team mascot. Parents are not allowed to be offended by it. That’s why all the cute stuff. Birds, Fish, the occasional Bulldog or Tiger or Eagle. All well and all behaviors understood from years of National Geographic and always depicted as goofy cartoons. But the Komodo Dragon?
Doesn’t fool anybody.
This thing is a nightmare. It can run as fast as a horse and swim faster than any human. It kills by ripping its prey apart with needle teeth that drip with poisonous toxin. And then it lets the carcass rot until it’s reeking and tenderized. These things are ten feet long, come in blue, grey, green, and orange, depending on how angry they are at you, and have large forked tongues that they use to smell your fear from 300 meters away.
So imagine you are traveling with your football team on some international sports ambassadors tour.
And you come up against the Komodo’s from Flores on the rim of the Savu Sea. All of them as muscular as a bundle of rope from their hard lives.
You don’t stand a chance.